Small Habits & Big Differences
Day-to-day Actions
Research shows that a handful of simple day-to-day actions increases the likelihood that your spouse will feel that you care deeply about them, and can have a huge impact on a couple’s level of happiness.
This week, try and do the following:
3 daily things to do for each other
- Say nothing negative about your partner, either to them, or about them to somebody else.
- Find one positive attribute that you can sincerely praise or affirm about your partner and tell them.
- Every day do one small act of kindness or generosity for each other.
3 things for her to do for him
- When you notice his effort, sincerely thank him for it. (e.g. "Thanks for mowing the lawn", or "you did a great job at __________.")
- Give him a hug or a passionate kiss for no reason, and show him that you desire him sexually.
- Encourage and believe in him, especially when he's feeling challenged.
3 things for him to do for her
- Take her hand when you are together. Put your arm around her or lay your hand on her knee when sitting next to her in public.
- Leave a note, or text her during the day to say you're thinking about her.
- Every day tell her that you love her; say sincerely she is beautiful.
Remember...you are very likely to make your spouse feel deeply cared for if you make a habit of doing these small things.
Your Date Night
Instructions
Agree on a time you can both meet when you won’t get distracted by children, or work, or anything else. You might choose to lie on your bed, go for a walk, or a drive, or visit a cafe.
Take it in turns to speak, and to listen. Listen with open hearts. Try not to interrupt, or judge, or criticise. Listen with the other person in mind, seeking not necessarily to agree, but to understand where they’re coming from. Remember, you have permission to have fun too!
Questions to ask each other
- Take it in turns to answer this question: "If your house was on fire, and everyone was out safely, what item would you be sure to take with you? Why?"
- Now think about your marriage. What top three things do you think are essential for any relationship to flourish? (Tip: your 'take it home' action points from the conference might help).
- Together, as a couple, decide on one thing that you'd like to try and implement in your relationship.
- How could you make it a reality? What steps do you need to take? What kind of encouragement could help?
- If you want to go deeper: Close by praying for one another. Thank God for the gift of having each other and ask for wisdom to continue to grow together in oneness.
Your turn to make a great marriage happen!
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